how we met - 4

I decided to write a record of what I remember about my early relationship with Tyler.  I am already forgetting so much, and I want to capture as many of the memories as possible.  I also want my kids to be able to read it, when and if they ever become more curious about it.  I know Tyler would tell it differently, but to me, this is how we met  -

part .5 here
part 1 here
part 2 here
part 3 here




Just a few days later and my car was once again packed full of everything I owned and I was once again saying goodbye to my roommates and friends.  As I headed out of town I stopped at my brothers' house to say goodbye.  I had loved living near them - loved seeing those kiddos here and there, and snuggling their new little baby boy.

This time I was travelling alone.  I'd taken this trip so many times, but now I was nervous.  Not only that, but I was leaving in the late afternoon and was driving through the night.  It was a really long night.

I remember pulling up into the parking lot of Tyler's apartment building at 7am and seeing a few fun friends gathered together to welcome me back with a breakfast.  I ran down that sidewalk and jumped into Tyler's arms.  It was like being home.  It didn't matter to me that our relationship was so new, that most of it had been long distance, that I moved back home with no guarantees or assurances that we would even make it as a couple.  In that moment I was where I wanted and needed to be.


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Our new routine included spending every free moment with each other.  We continued on the same foundation of our friendship, and we did so many of the same things.  We took long drives, often over Gates pass and around the Tucson Mountains and back into town through Marana.  We cooked a lot of meals together, and played games at his apartment.  One time I'm pretty sure we almost broke up over a game of Risk.

Tyler worked swing shifts at the Silverbell Mine after the semester ended, and I was back at my job working with kids at an elementary school.  Sometimes on his way out to his late shift at the mine he'd stop by my work and I'd take a little break and spend some time with him.  It was never long enough, and always got harder to send him off to his job.

We talked about marriage.  We weren't sure what our plans were, but we loved each other.  We loved spending time together.  Soon our plans and talks started to get a little more serious.  It wasn't so much about if, but when.  

We had our share of doubts.  I know there were times when I wondered if I should stay in this relationship or not.  I knew Tyler had some of the same concerns.  On one long drive he told me that if we were going to get married, it wouldn't be for a long time.

I was really hurt and confused, I think, but I said I was fine with it.  I went home that evening not knowing what was going to happen with us.  Were we going to make it?  Was this going to be like some other relationships I'd had and just end suddenly with me left kind of stunned and embarrassed and unsure and alone?

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I talked to him sometime that next afternoon.  He told me he needed to talk to me.  When I got home from work I cleaned up a bit and he picked me up. 

I didn't know where I stood.  I loved this boy.  I did.  And I knew he loved me.  But it was all so hard, sometimes.  It wasn't any fairy tale romance, that was for sure.  We had real legitimate obstacles and issues and it was hard to know if it was all worth it.

All this was swimming around in my head as we drove.