thinking out loud

We spent almost the entire last week without internet access.  The first couple of days?  No problem!  I felt free!  Day 3?  Inconvenienced.  There was stuff I needed to get done and it just bugged me I couldn't do any of it!  Day 4,5,6?  It definitely started to affect my mental health!  So dramatic, but I seriously didn't realize before how much reading and information and intellectual stimulation help me embrace the rest of my life.  Short story?  I'm grateful for internet access.  It's a blessing I'm happy to enjoy.

We had warm weather early in the week, so that made it all the more bearable.  It was in the 50's and sunny and so beautiful!  And now the sunshine and any warmth are gone and I am sad.  Growing up in bright Tucson made me into a sun-loving girl, and there's no changing that.  Something like, you can take the girl out of the desert, but you can't take the desert out of the girl?  That doesn't really work, now, does it?

And these days we are really missing our old home.  Mostly, we are just missing being around family.  We feel quite isolated from them and their lives.  They all have so much going on, and we aren't a part of any of it.  And, meanwhile, all those little nieces and nephews are growing up so fast I can barely even believe it!

If there were a place we could live that was warm and sunny MOST of the time, and close to all of our missed and dear family members, THAT is the place I want to call home.  If I could get a few acres in a place like that - well, I would be just about the most content a person could be in this life.

But, here we stay, in our home-away-from-home.  We love our little town.  Our neighborhood.  Our house. Our yard.  We do!  I suppose we are a little gypsy, and we have the itch to restart somewhere else.  After all, none of our kids have ever lived in any place as long as we've lived here!  Our 9 year old has moved 7 times in his life, and we've lived here about 3 years, so you can see we kept moving early on in our marriage.

The thing is, here's the thing.  As much as I like change, and as much as I miss 'home', I really want a place where our kids can grow up with their long-time friends, and when they are teens they can remember being friends with the same kids back when they were in kindergarten.  Doesn't that sound so nostalgically ideal?  I love the thought.  But, really, I grew up in the same place from the time I was 4 until I left home, and I don't have that, so, is what I dream of really something that happens?  I have no idea.